On one of the days, I was there cleaning chotchkies to put out and a lady arrived who was there to volunteer. We started chatting and one thing led to another and she asked my if I was saved. I told her that I was. She asked me for the story of my walk with God and emphasized her curiosity about whether I had an experience that made me a believer. I told her that I was raised in the church and that so far, I have always believed in God's existence and that I have never had one single experience that made me believe. She kept looking at me, so I continued by telling her that my belief has never wavered because of a bunch of small things instead of one large thing. I told her about times when I have been on a hike and found a waterfall deep in the woods, and as I stood at the foot of the water fall, getting mist sprayed on me, I knew. I just knew that He was there.
This is just one example of a small, faith affirming moment that has happened in my life. These moments are often accompanied by goosebumps on my arms and a flutter in my stomach as I get "the feeling" (I honestly don't know what else to call it). I would describe "the feeling" as the re-realization that someone greater than me made the world and everything in it, and that he is loving, and so mighty, and so dazzling brilliant. I get this feeling every time I look at the stars, whenever it stand at the edge of the ocean, and every time a watch a butterfly go by. They tend to sneak up on me, but each time I get "the feeling" I am able to recognize what it is and I get so ecstatic whenever it does.
As I talked to her, I didn't get too gushy on the topic (I mean, I didn't want to freak her out!) and believe me, I can. I left it at that and continued to wipe off old china. She then told me all about her life, which was hard to listen to. She has had a truly hard life; one that is hard for me to even imagine living. There seemed to be a long list of horrors throughout her life including everything from her father losing his mind and thinking she was LITERALLY the devil and constantly abusing her in numerous, unspeakable ways to her substance abuse and having a kid at a very young age and having him taken away from her. As the story of her life went on, I realized that I was talking to a true survivor.
When she got to the part of her life when she went to church for the first time with her grandmother, she was crying. She said, "I was afraid to go to church because I thought that the building would burn down if I set foot in it." I was close to tears myself but couldn't help but giggle along with her as she said this. Her story ends with her slowly coming to know God and trust in Him. Even though her struggles still follow her, she told me that she is so happy now because she finds her strength through God and knows that all thing are possible through him. Her faith warmed my heart and honestly, impressed me. She has been through so much in her life and was able to move on through her faith. She is another person from my time here that I will never forget.
As I'm sure you all know, Blizzard Juno came through the North East this week. We didn't get as much snow as they were predicting, but we did get enough to make everything look totally gorgeous. A few times, I have found myself walking out of a building and un-expectantly walking into snow fall. Each of these times I have gotten "the feeling". I couldn't help but take a second and stand there to notice each little flake as it gently floats down to the ground to join it's friends. It's just one of those little things that is so dang lovely that I have this overwhelming feeling of love and confidence in God's presence. I thought of the volunteer at the ReStore as I watched those little flakes fall. I hope that wherever she was when Blizzard Juno hit, she felt the love that I felt from that little moment.
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| A picture I took in front of the house today. |
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